come home with me. we should get married.
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HOW TO BEAT A DEAD HORSE, MAGICALLY REVIVE HIM AND, AS SOON AS HIS HEARTBEAT REGISTERS, BEGIN BEATING HIM SENSELESSLY ALL OVER AGAIN.

Guess how long pretending a chihuahua wrapped in a black towel is really an old, grief-stricken Sicilian widow can seem very funny? Now multiply that by 20, because that's how long I laughed myself retarded doing it.

I hope you had a nice fourth of July. LIVING IN AMERICA! Am I right?

[small Italian, widowed dog courtesy of Miss Kambri Crews.]

WE FIRST MET ON 07.05.2004

it's just a line; don't worry too much
read the archives, please. does that make me gay? meet the author, more or less. this is the email link you were perhaps looking for