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When I first heard the new Beastie Boys single, "Ch-Check It Out," I was unmoved. I think it's because I was focusing on their lyrical flow which was, as always, stank. I now realize it is the most important song ever written.

Of course, that's not true. But it has crept beneath my skin and nestled there. With every repeated listen, its hook makes me more and more stupid and glad for it. Damn them, because they're too old to be fresh, too cool to be cool. But bless them, too.

I have to admit I've got some issues with Adam Yauch aka MCA this time around. Yauch has officially forgotten how to write raps. Forget that the rhymes contain ideas no more complex than, "Rapping and rapping and rapping all the TIME/Trying to write the dopest RHYME/You like beer, I like WINE/I'm a PhD Dr. Rappenstein." I've come to expect that in their songs. But Yauch has fallen off. On this track he seems incapable of even adhering to the Beasties' simple rhyme flow formula: da da da da da da da da DA, and repeat. He's adding extra syllables, rushing off-beat, incapable of keeping pace. I guess it's hard to rap from the lotus position, or whatever crazy Buddhist shit he's gotten into.

Also, Adam Horowitz is eternally youthful. And also, Mike Diamond is not. Eat a cupcake, man. Mike D is looking Kafkaesque these days.


WE FIRST MET ON 05.28.2004

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